Prologue to the blog
Do you remember the 1996 movie Harriet The Spy with Rosie O’Donnell? I don’t like writing because of that movie. Specifically, the scene where they are playing tag and Harriet leaves her journal with all of her thoughts and feelings in the grass only for Marion to find it and ruin her life with it, because Marion is the worst. My worst fear growing up was people reading what I wrote, and hating me for it. So I never wrote, nor when I had to, I never wrote with any great detail. If Harriet stuck to bullet points Marion would have been bored and not blasted the journal to EVERYONE. It takes me hours to write even 300 words because I second guess everything erase it, then re-write.
Long story, long. I wrote a lot, a lot more than I usually do.
This moment feels like that scene where Harriet realizes her journal is missing, people are reading her thoughts and she is freaking out.
The end of 2020 FINALLY
This year has felt like 20 years rolled into one. When the New Year’s Eve ball dropped in 2019, I had made a decision that was changing my life and said this is my year. I had decided that I was going to jump into photography full time. I mean, I went to The Art Institue of Colorado in 2003 for film photography.
I have always been scared of actually doing what I kept coming back to year after year. It’s like in those romantic movies where the leads know they are in love with each other, and they make each other better, though, for some stupid reason, they aren’t together. It’s that pull, that attraction that keeps bringing them back together. That’s me but with photography.
For years I would do a handful of weddings, family sessions, senior photos, and other sessions; time after time, the same question would arise “Why aren’t you doing this?” So when my corporate design job just felt suffocating to the point that I would drive to work and sit in my car for 20 min and cry to muster the guts to walk in in to the building to spend my day doing something that killed me inside, I said this was my sign, this is my moment, this is when I do it and jump feet first. The universe said “GO NOW!” and I did!
Then came the plot twist I didn’t see coming my way. The writers of my life are clearly not a fan of me. This must be my Disney Villian backstory arc or something.
Please make sure that your arm rests and tray tables are in the upright position as we rapidly decend down.
2020 was the worst year of my life personally.
It started out when our 2-year-old cat Sailor who died unexpectantly of kidney failure in Feb. In March our favorite friend Covid-19 hit, then online learning, then my great aunt died of Covid, moving my grandmother out of her home into a nursing home, then a few weeks later my grandmother died, then my uncle died of a heart attack, then our 11-year-old golden retriever Olive died. So needless to say, I’m having a great year!
Have you been to a pandemic funeral yet this year? I’ve attended a few 0/10 do not recommend.
You know when you’re swimming and you’re barely underwater, you can see the surface, you can reach out your arm and be above water. That’s how I felt every day, like couldn’t come up for air and it was so close and some days it felt like I was deeper.
Despite all of that, I was starting a business. I left my 9-5, When I quit I told my boss that working there, and I quote ” Didn’t thrill me”. I know would have been let go anyway during all of this so there was no excuse not to work as my life depended on it. I had to figure out how to make this be successful how to build something in the middle of a global pandemic while my life was falling apart and on fire.
What’s a girl to do when life gives you lemons? I threw myself into building my business. I focused on what I could do. The weddings I lined up the year before all moved so, all previous thought processes went out the window. Then something magical happened and, my inbox was flooded with amazing people. I have been so blessed that I was able to meet so many couples this year and still be able to shoot a handful of small weddings. I have had so much fun and hearing the joy my photos brought to my couples and it has really meant the world to me.
Professionally this year has been amazing.
I’m truly blessed to have so many amazing 2021 couples. I exceeded the goal I had set out before the pandemic. It’s been mind-blowing and truly phenomenal, I cannot wait for 2021 and everything that I have lined up. Everyone I have had the honor of shooting this year kept me from completely falling apart. I had a goal and purpose that kept me just moving forward for that, I am thankful, truly I am. Moving kept me from letting the quicksand of my life take over and I didn’t realize how fast I was going or how much I was doing until I sat down recently to take everything into account.
So thank you to all my couples for being a beacon of light for me during this wild year we all have been experiencing. Thank you for trusting me with telling your love story and chasing waterfalls with me and not sticking to the rivers and lakes that you’re used to. I wanted to give joy during this pandemic and in return, you gave it back to me. You are all beautiful people inside and out and I can’t wait to work with you next year. I may be some random girl when we met, taking you to back alleys in Detroit or Hiking for 2 hours to get to a breathtaking spot in the Upper Peninsula, but I hope by the end we are friends with fun stories of our adventures together.
Hopefully, 2021 can be the year we all thought 2020 was going to be when the ball dropped last new years. I hope everyone stays safe and healthy. I can’t wait to get back out there and celebrate with you all and watch your drunk friend Dave (there’s always a Dave) try to do the worm on the dance floor.
Cheers to a New Year!